Great Falls Flasher

Great Falls Montana, population 58,950, not one of the most exciting places I've been, but forever burned into my recently traumatized brain. After a long day of flying I decided to venture to the hot tub for some very cherished "me time".

For a little background, this hot tub is indoors, facing the back side of the hotel. The back of the hotel is just open to the railroad and a subdivision behind that.

Well as I was soaking, I noticed this man sitting outside in his underwear, or as I thought at the time, a speedo. I didn't really think anything of it. I thought maybe he had been swimming earlier and now he was just out there cooling of or something.  If there is one thing I have learned in this job, it's that people do strange things! I am not one to question the random behaviors of the human race.

I continued with my personal solace, listening to some Bon Iver while jets eased my tired muscles. Every once in a while I would just glance at the weirdo outside. It was dark, but I noticed some more strange behavior as he seemed to be taking off his ever-classy wife beater. Again, people are strange, so I just kind of brushed it off. My biggest fear at this point was that he was going to decide to come back inside, be Mr. Chatty Kathy and interrupt my personal time. I never in a million years could have imagined what happened next....

I look up and this man is butt naked against the window/door...DANCING...Great Falls full frontal strip show!!!!!!! For a moment my brain decided to seize up. I was paralyzed by shock. I had my phone with me and I was like oh my gosh...do I call 911 ahh what do I do, but then I snapped out of it and remembered that the front desk was only about 20 feet and a door away. However, I was a little nervous that he was gonna come busting in the door as I was by myself. I weighed my options for a brief moment and then made a run for it! Sopping wet I come flying out of the pool room and yell at the front desk, "THERE"S A NAKED MAN OUT THERE!!!!!!" The man and woman at the desk go pale white...the woman, "WHAT?!?!?" The guy, "Oh no, was he skinny?" Me, "I don't know!!!! He was old!" The man ran out the side door as I sat there frantically explaining the whole story. "I think he ran off that way, but he was old and I guess he was kind of skinny..." The woman suggested that I just go get my stuff and leave the hot tub. NO JOKE!!!! Did she honestly think I was just gonna go back in there and chill? NO WAY IN HELL! I'm not sure that I can even go to Great Falls again, let alone the hot tub!

Well let's just say that night I did not sleep well. My room just happened to be on that side of the building, and every little noise had me at the window, flashlight in hand, searching for the Great Falls Flasher. I had to get up early the next morning, and questioned if I could call in for this type of situation. The thought of their reaction at headquarters to this whole story was comical enough. I told the pilots I was with and the van driver in the morning about the whole ordeal. The pilots thought it was hysterical, and the van driver just kept apologizing. The rest of the day I endured Adam Sandler lines about loose skin and old balls. We had a commuting pilot who would be staying in Great Falls the next night, so of course he got the story too. He was going to follow up and see if they arrested him or something. We just told him to be aware of the Great Falls Flasher. When we finally finished the trip the First Office asked me if I was gonna be okay, and if I needed to stop for therapy on my way home. I told him maybe, and asked if the company would pay for it. They both just laughed.

When I got home I googled Great Falls flasher. Sure enough a news article popped up from last year when a man was arrested for a series of indecent exposure incidents. So either there are a lot of bored creeps in Montana, or this guy is back to his old tricks. Enjoy imagining this strip show!

So there ya have it. All these big cities I've been in, and the most traumatizing experience comes from good old Montana. Who would have thought. So just beware if you venture to Great Falls. The Flasher awaits!

As of Late

Denver

I must admit, lately I have been an absolute failure at blog writing. It has definitely been a while so I think I have a lot to catch up on. I don't think I can give a completely full-on detailed account of the last few months without boring you to death so instead let's focus on the most memorable passengers, crews and moments as of late....

One of the hardest parts of the job I have yet to master would be handling the overly personal passengers. The ones who want to know your whole life story, be your new best friend, or even be the future love of your life....ahh. This is difficult for me because I have to be nice, and let's just say things can get awkward.

On one of my recent flights I had a very "nice" lady. The fun began when she nearly started crying because she was so happy I was so nice and helpful towards her. She then told me that I was definitely a Christian because of the way that I acted. This brought her in to a conversation on my religious history and upbringing, and where her stance on religion was. After deciding that I was a suitable girl she decided she was going to set me up with her nephew who owns a heavy construction business....in Montana. "How old are you?" she asked. I told her my age and she followed up with a very loud squeal of, "OHHH that's perfect! Trent will just love you and he's rich!!!! I've got to get your number." Somehow I managed to escape the conversation and retreat back to the galley. I could not avoid her forever though, and on my next trip back she started on my hair..."Your hair is just so pretty! Who does it? Where do you get it done?" I told her my friend in Utah. At this time, the lady is running her hands through my hair. Not sure how to handle this I just stand there and smile while this lady treats me like her pet cat. She then proceeded to tell me that my hair is just so pretty and thick....now that one nearly had me on the floor laughing. My hair is far from think. Being bald until the age of 2 and accepting the fact that I will soon be bald again, I am very aware of this! Well soon it was time for service. By the time I got to her row, the ice was dwindling and there were a couple of frozen blocks. She decided to help me out and just grabbed the ice bag and started breaking up the chunks for me. Very nice of her. Then she held open the bag so I could scoop the ice. The guy sitting across from her just gave me this sympathetic and understanding smile. All around this was a very entertaining flight, with probably one of the sweetest women I've ever me, but boundaries people. Please.

I always feel bad for those poor parents braving the traveling nightmare with multiple children. I can't imagine dragging 2 or 3 kids through airports, trying to keep them entertained and quiet in a small enclosed area, and doing everything possible to keep the kid in their seat with the belt fastened. My understanding hit a new level on one particular flight. A woman was traveling with her toddler and an infant. Both children had been so good the entire flight. I was the aft flight attendant so my seat was right next to the mom. We were in our final descent, and I was all buckled in and ready for landing. But as the landing gear dropped, so did the toddler's patience. She started freaking out and climbing out of her seat. The poor mom was trying to get her to sit down and get her seatbelt on while trying to hold on to the infant as well. I was stretched out of my seat holding the infant on the moms lap so she didn't roll off. The toddler would not cooperate at all, so at the last minute the mom throws me the infant and grabs the toddler. Now while we are in position for landing we are supposed to be going through procedures, so as I'm freaking out about the fact that I'm holding a baby I was figuring what I would have to do with the infant if we had a situation. Luckily this baby was absolutely adorable and super well behaved. She just sat on my lap happy as ever. The landing touchdown was not the smoothest, so I was very glad that the mom had held on to the toddler. We taxied to the gate, baby in arms and all. I'm sure it was quite the sight!

A word to the wise...do not drink too much before trying to board an airplane. We are not allowed to transport drunk passengers. I know those long sits in airport lounges can be difficult, but please self-monitor. We would hate to kick you off your flight. On an 11 am departure (boards at 1030!) we had two guys who had somehow managed to have a little too much. As soon as they got on the plane they were giving hugs and high fives to everybody. It was great that they were friendly drunks, and when they realized that we were concerned they started to beg. Promising to be quiet, good, nice, etc. I promise when you are drunk enough that other passengers are concerned, you will not be going on the flight. We said goodbye to our intoxicated friends and left them in slc!

As far as crews go, I've flown with a lot of great people. However, with mixed personalities and lifestyles, sometimes things can get interesting. There are 2 particularly well-known flight attendants in my base for being slightly different. Lucky for me, I've managed to fly with both of them. First off was Wacky Wanda. Wanda is a very nice and sweet lady. I actually quite enjoyed flying with her. It was a very entertaining day. She told me that she thought she was mental and schizophrenic when it comes to relationships. Not sure what she meant by that I asked for clarification. Her response, "Well I've just dated so many guys and I like things about all of them, but I can't decide on just one." I'm not sure how that makes her schizophrenic but I went with it. She was by far more boy-crazy than me, and she had a good 15 years on me....strange. Then there was the trip from hell with Crazy Cathy. Opposite of Wanda, Cathy is not just crazy, she is mean, demoralizing and self-righteous. I did not enjoy flying with her at all. It actually took a week to recover from it I think. Cathy believes that our society is poisoned by the media, pivot line sprinkler fields are actually missiles, and that she once had cancer but she was cured because she found a man on match.com who had a cancer curing machine banned in the US because cancer is a billion dollar industry. She also got very upset with me when I didn't know where this tiny little country she once lived in was. She felt that it was irresponsible of me to work in this job and not know. She asked what I would do if I met someone from there. My response if they were from there they wouldn't need to ask me questions about it. I'm pretty sure she is confused, working for a regional airline that flies mainly domestic routes, maybe she should brush up on her knowledge on the US...just a thought.

1 year anniversary baby!

Oh wow, well that was pretty long. Sorry for the long blog drought and then this flood of a post. I did make my 1 year anniversary a couple of weeks ago. Milestones! Anyway, I promise to be better. I do have more stories to tell so it won't be long. Safe travels until then!

San Antonio

Happy Holidays

The joys of being on the bottom of the pyramid when it comes to the all powerful and mighty seniority system of the airlines are endless. Really who doesn't love working every holiday, weekend, long hour, low paying trip out there?? In all reality, I have very little to complain about, and my experiences over the holidays seemed to be eye openers for sure! Not every moment was great, but I did have plenty of good experiences to look back on. I would definitely call this last month a growing point in my life as I faced a new way to spend the holidays!

In my 22 years of life I have never been away from home for the holidays. I am very much set in my ways when it comes to seasonal tradition. It all changed this year when I was assigned a 4 day trip the 23-26. Fortunately most hotels have all of the television stations that show my Christmas favorites so I didn't miss any Christmas Vacation, Christmas Story or Elf time! The food was a little bit different as my Christmas breakfast consisted of a stale muffin and cheap OJ and I had a lovely family Christmas dinner (Captain and FO being my family) at Denny's! And just like extended family holiday parties, there were people that made my day and of course the people that cause those suicidal holiday spikes (I'm talking about you, Bozeman Beasts)!

I gained a new appreciation for those who spend holidays away from loved ones! It's much harder than you anticipate. I can't imagine how hard it is for those in the military so far from home, or for people across the Country who just can't afford to go home to see their family. I think precious time with my family for the holidays is something I always took for granted, but I realized just how fortunate I am to be around so many people I love and care about!

Well enough of the mushy stuff. Here is a brief overview of my first holiday season as a flight attendant. May it always be memorable!

The adventures began in Denver with an overly friendly driver and the longest shuttle ride of my life. I decided to take the hotel shuttle to a nearby mall. Of course this was going to be a 20 minute journey and it was just me and the driver. He was from Ethiopia, and apparently ready to find an American woman and settle down. Fortunately he did not know where Utah was, or anything about it for that matter. He was asking me if he should move there. I told him it was basically like Denver, but he should probably stay in Denver because it was a little more exciting. He then went on to tell me Salt Lake was better because I was there so he was going to move there. For the next 20 minutes I awkwardly tried to avoid answering any of his questions about our future together and me becoming his American Woman...oh boy.

Outdoor World in Denver

There were plenty of people that helped make working the holidays worth it. I had many passengers thank me for working so they could get home to their families (not that I had a choice, but hey you're welcome!). One passenger wrote me a very sweet Christmas card and included a nice assortment of Ghirardelli Chocolates. There are a lot of unaccompanied minors traveling during the season, and it was fun to hear their Christmas stories. My favorite were the two cute sisters. The older girl had to walk with the help of crutches, and her younger sister was so helpful and made sure to take care of her. They were so excited to tell me all about their Christmas and show me their new dolls and jewelry. They were absolutely adorable.

I've always been a huge fan of New Years Eve. It may have something to do with my Grandparents turning us all into party animals at a very young age. This year I was a little concerned with New Years Eve options in the grand old town of Idaho Falls, but I decided I had to do something. I text a friend from there and asked her what in the world people do in Idaho Falls on New Years. She told me to go the the Shilo....yes the Shilo Inn. I was a little skeptical too! On the way to the airport I was telling the pilots about her suggestion. They laughed and asked what in the world is at the Shilo? Our shuttle driver piped right in "oh yeah they have a dance floor there". My eyes lit up. A dance floor at the Shilo....yessssss!!! Pilots continued to laugh and asked jokingly if I was going dancing. Is that even a question?? (they totally thought I was kidding) I however, was not kidding. That night I ventured through the cold over to the Shilo to find the place to be on New Years Eve, and it did not disappoint. I was a little nervous/feeling a little loserish at first being at such a social place, but it wasn't long before I made new friends and was dancing the night away. Despite an early show time the next morning I celebrated into the new year. Feeling happy and content with my new friends and doing something a little different on New Years!