The Mile High Club

I have been asked many times by many people if I've ever had anyone try to join the Mile High Club. I always laughed at this idea for 3 reasons.

1. Most of the aircraft that I fly on only come equipped with one lavatory for the entire plane. It's kind of hard for TWO to secretly spend time in there together.

2. These lavatories are incredibly small! Some larger passengers can barely fit themselves into there. Fitting TWO people...no chance.

and.... 3. Airplane lavatories are absolutely disgusting, these small, uncomfortable ones may even be worse than the norm! Airplanes hit bumps, people miss, men are bad aim....you see what I'm saying. This is just not a good idea people.

But last night, 2 smelly young hipsters with wild ideas gave it a shot. I guess she just could not resist his  out of control side burns that somehow managed to extend to his nose. Or maybe it was his crazy long rockstar hair. Whatever it was, these 2 were determined! They lucked out with seats right on the back row, the perfect spot just inches from the lav. The night flight set the mood with a dimly lit cabin.

We first became suspicious when they kept turning off the overhead light by the lav door. Of course they always had some crazy story as to how it was magically turning off. People walking by, closing the door, power outages...give me a break. My first awkward encounter happened when I went back to check the supplies in the lav, I opened the unlocked door and there was wild hipster boy just sitting on the toilet. Fortunately he was not using the facility and he was completely clothed. I apologized and hurriedly slammed the door. By the time I got back to the front the other flight attendant informed me that she was pretty sure they were now BOTH in the lav.

Little shocks me on an airplane these days, but this absolutely floored me! Really, Mile High attempt, in that lav?!?! (It was even worse than usual because of a semi-functional toilet)

So both of us, still shocked, head to the back. We get to their seats, and sure enough both of them are missing. I am not sure that I learned anything about being a professional "cock-block" in training, but these skills were about to come into play. Basically we just knocked on the door and ran. It was a semi-doorbell ditch type of plan. We giggled like little girls all the way back up to the front. We figured the two would realize they were busted and shamefully returned to their seats, but remember, I mentioned that they were determined. NO LUCK! The other flight attendant was much bolder than me, and at this point had enough of their wayward antics. She marched back there, meaning business, slammed on the door and requested that they get out now! This proved to be more effective as I watched them sulkily exit the lav with sad defeat on their faces.

The rest of the flight was spent constantly monitoring the out of control hormonal pair. They were just too weird to ignore. We later had the unfortunate discover of seeing his leopard print underwear, and that was just much more than we ever needed to know! Thanks crazy hipster couple for making the job a bit more entertaining. Until next time friendly skies.